Traditionally,
society has collectively encouraged marriage for two primary purposes:
companionship and procreation. Therefore, even
today, people think getting married should be one of your most important goals,
regardless of your success. However, this traditional view of marriage has been
challenged over the years as couples seek to redefine what it means to be
married and why they should get married.
Feeling
pressured to marry is one of the most common feelings that Indians have to
endure because we view marriage as a significant milestone in a family's history
in India. Consequently, many of these pressured marriages fail because men and
women are unhappy with it for their reasons and are no longer afraid of the
repercussions of leaving a marriage.
Wedlock has always signified compromise,
adjustment, love, and respect. Yet, today we are willing to part ways with our
partner at the slightest inconvenience caused. Men and women are no longer
scared of stepping out of their marriages if it comes in the way of their lives.
For centuries, women
were expected to stay in a marriage, no matter the circumstances, even if it
meant putting up with a husband or family who was abusive or neglectful. This
has changed as well. Women today have the financial and social security to
stand on their own feet, which was not the case even a few decades ago. Therefore,
they choose to avoid any marital discord.
These days weddings
are lavish and memorable to the greatest extent feasible. As per a KPMG report,
an Indian is likely to spend a fifth of their lifetime earnings on a wedding,
which can cost anywhere between ₹5 lahks to ₹5 crores. But as a society, we fail
to miss what shapes up beneath those beautiful wedlock pictures and video
shoots.
Pheromones
and serotonin, also known as "love," flood us in relationships. But
developing, sustaining, and strengthening a mutually respectful relationship
requires work. Much of that work is done in small moments and daily habits,
where love is expressed through gestures of compassion, support, trust, and
understanding. These gestures take practice and repetition as one learns to
trust, empathise with, and forgive one's partner.
We must
marry for the reasons that we hold close to our hearts. Marriage should be an
act of free will, motivated by a desire to create a special bond with another
person. We should not succumb to societal pressures or expectations but take
the time to understand and appreciate the unique relationship between two
individuals. So, even if the marriage occurs at a later age than is typical, it
will last. This will enable us to enter the marriage with a deeper
understanding and appreciation of the mate.
This is my
way of looking at this issue, which might be debatable for many of you. As such, couples need to take
their time deciding to marry and be aware of societal expectations and
pressures to make rational and informed decisions.
